Ros Taylor Group

Kuh Kuh Kuh - Shoosh?

I just read a headline that said that by the age of seven the average child will already have spent one whole year in front of a computer screen. The “scientists” quoted in the article expressed misgivings about this. There were mutterings about “re-mapping neural pathways” and dark prognostications about the impact this could have on their ability to interact socially with anything that wasn’t an avatar.

I read this on the tube. All around me were the parents of these seven year olds.  They all – I mean ALL – had a “device” and some were Two Devicers.  A Kindle and an iPod. An iPhone to game on while they listened to those “kuh kuh kuh koosh” sounds you hear from the headphones. The article adverted to these people too.  The authors expressed concern about these screen-addicted seven year olds learning from their device-addicted parents that it was ok to surf and talk. Indeed it is more than ok - it is normal. Undivided attention? What’s that?

Now don’t get me wrong.  I am no kind of Luddite Jeremiah. I read on the train. I have an iPod, I have an iPad – I just don’t take them with me everywhere I go.  A young man beside me sported antenna-like headphones – big, bright, red. Kuh kuh kuh koosh, they went. Kuh kuh kuh koosh.

Do they ever stop?  When are they quiet? When do they really relax?  Is there a moment without stimulation?  This is important.  At a recent group, every single one of the participants requested we have regular e-Breaks. It’s not a euphemism. They all needed to check their e-mail.  Or to put it another way – they needed to top up their stress factors. They were missing their fix.

So we did a little Stress Factors questionnaire.  I began by asking them if they thought they were stressed. Not a bit of it.  They all were.  And this was on the simplest of measures – rate of respiration.  We should be taking between 10 and 12 breaths per minute.  The average in our group was 23.  It’s not so much you’re not taking in enough oxygen you’re not breathing OUT enough Carbon Dioxide. So you get tense without even knowing it.  Ever wondered why you feel so good standing on a cliff top with a wind blowing?

So what do we do?  Well we recommend the Power Minute. Count the number of breaths you take in a minute.  If it’s high, do it again and try to get it below 10. At one level we have to realise there is a problem building.  On the other there is an epidemic of stress. We have to intervene.  It takes commitment but it can be done. Years ago I worked for an executive who set aside an hour of his working day to relaxation.  If you called during this time his secretary would say something like “I’m sorry, he’s trampolining!”  He knew that relaxed executives are smart creative executives and that bouncing up and down de-stressing is better than bouncing off the walls.                                                                                                                                                                                                                          

 

BOB CLYDE

B= f(P,E)?

I was recently engaged to coach a high-potential individual in a big (think BIG)
company.  He was a man with a mission and a corner office and a Mont Blanc pen and a PA and monogrammed shirt cuffs.  What more could a man want? Well let’s start with some  communications skills.

Me:                 So how’s the new job?

Him:               Great. Going well. Lot to do …

Me:                 How’s the team?

Him:               Bit disappointing actually …

Me:                 (Interrogative raising of eyebrow)

Him:               Yes, only a couple of them have been to see me

Me:                 How long’ve you been in post?

Him:               Three weeks …

Me:                 Where are they?

Him:               Out there (jabbing a finger in the direction of the cubicles)

Me:                 And you haven’t been to see them?

Him:               (Looking surprised) Eh, noooooo …

If this wasn’t true you’d accuse me of making it up. But sadly it is true. He was sitting there, waiting for his “subordinates” to make obeisance. It told me a lot about the organisation and how it thought, and reminded me (again) how often very capable people get pitched straight into jobs for which they have had precisely no training – other than watching their predecessor do it badly too. 

Ok – so I coached him. He was a shoo-in. Bright intelligent articulate. The term duck to water springs to mind. Soon, team meetings, dog food labs (don’t ask!) and Koolade sessions abounded. He GOT it. His team GOT it. In the year we worked together his division delivered a double-digit performance hike.

So guess what?  He thought “Let’s do more of this. Let’s spread the word”. So guess what? “They” said “No”.  Apparently his team’s performance had improved and “they” didn’t think it needed to improve anymore!  So guess what?  He left. You can take a horse to the water but you can’t tell it not to drink.

My client clearly had a high capacity for growth and change. He was flexible, open minded, self aware and focused. The very characteristics that contributed to his promotion and upward trajectory also allowed him to achieve rapid gains from executive coaching. But they also contributed to his single-minded decision to leave the business when “roadblocks” were put in his way. And let’s be clear. This was no petulant flounce out the door, dolls out the pram departure. It took over a year. But when he realised that his organisation wanted him to improve – but not too much – he knew it was time to go.

The rather cryptic title of this piece means behaviour is a function of the person in their environment. The people who commissioned the coaching engagement have all heard of Kurt Lewin. They all know about “the frozen organisation” – but “it can’t apply to us, surely?”  Oh yes it can. Until these businesses realise that if they keep changing the people but don’t change the business culture – they are just training their competitors’ new recruits. It's a simple equation - which part of that don't they understand?

 

BOB CLYDE

How's Your Vision?

When I run Leadership Masterclasses I almost always ask my audience what makes a successful leader - having vision usually comes top of the list. But as we will see it is not always as easy as it might seem to have a vision of what you want to achieve as a leader. However, as is so often the case if you dig a bit you can identify underlying principles and structures that successful visionaries seem to have in common. Let me share with you the 4 Principles that I found almost all the Chief Executives shared that I interviewed for my book Fast Track to the Top.

The government at the moment is revealing how challenging it is to have a coordinated vision. They want to move loads of services, we the tax payer can't afford, to the charity sector but at the same time want to reclaim taxes from the rich philanthropists who provide the funding. These two 'visions' have just collided. Encouraging philanthropists to donate to offset their tax bill and boost charitable fortunes always seemed a true win-win to me. So why curb donations when you want the third sector to take on more social service responsibility?

So the first principle of vision is Consistency

I heard recently of a CEO appointment where even before the announcement of his post he was on the phone to the facilities manager asking for the 15th floor where directors had been residing in splendid isolation for years to be vacated. He wanted to ensure there was space amongst the troops to enable these directors to be in touch with the business. He was ensuring the viability of his vision.

So the second principle is Viability

This new CEO will then have to endure the slings and arrows of passive aggression and stay on course. To back down would undermine his vision and future standing. I remember one company which had their vision writ large in reception. It was around striving for excellence but at the same time being family friendly towards its staff. When I was met by a young employee in reception I mentioned the wholesomeness of the vision. She dismissed it with a gesture and said that it was launched with much razzmatazz and lasted for about a month. With the onset of the first crisis they all had to work late unasked and no one trusted a word that issued from the board of directors again.

So the third principle is Persistence

Vision is the responsibility of the CEO and leader. This is not a consensus exercise. You can always tell "visions by committee". They have bullet points and are completely unmemorable as everyone has to have their say represented. Inclusion is a great workplace philosophy but not for the focus of a vision. Even worse is to call in consultants to generate the content for you. This is the leader's preserve. The time for participation is after, during the implementation phase. A vision should have a shelf life of two or three years before being revisited and should also be short. What use is a vision if no one remembers it!? I was writing a chapter in my book Confidence at Work about vision and mission statements and due to a computer glitch lost the chapter. The only vision I remembered out of the list I reproduced was the old Starbucks one “2000 shops by the year 2000”.  Short works!

So the fourth principle is Communication

And finally a vision has to be grounded but challenging.  Unique. It should be framed in such a way that it can only be yours.  It certainly shouldn’t be around being the best in the market, woollily aspirational blandishments around delivering “best of breed services to a growing international clientele… yada yada yawn”   it should be specifically about your business and where you want the it to go and be framed in such a manner that everyone will know when they get there. It must be inspirational.  But it must also change with time. Starbucks DID get to 2000 shops by 2000 – now most recently they “personalize” your “coffee experience” by asking your name, writing it on the mug and also remembering which person is which!

So the fifth principle is Challenge

To learn more about the techniques of constructing a compelling vision read Confidence at Work or join us on one of our courses.  Thanks for stopping by.

 

ROS TAYLOR

 

 

Diff'rent Strokes?

I was working recently with a group of senior educationalists. Head teachers every one. They were a very bright lot with interests as varied as pottery, archery and hang gliding.  A group of high fliers you might say.  As diverse as their interests were, they were depressingly of one voice on a key issue.  Reward.  They certainly didn’t mean “monetary reward” they meant “Reward” - the sense of gratification that comes with the acknowledgement of a job well done.  As one of them put it “The only reward we get is not to get hammered if we meet our targets.” Another said “If I meet my targets, my reward is to get to help the failing establishments in our district.  My workload increases, and my stress factors shoot up.”

We had been talking about “stroking” a concept so named by Eric Berne as part of his theory of “Transactional Analysis”.  Experiments with monkeys revealed that, separated early from their mothers, monkeys appeared to derive comfort from a cloth draped over wire bent into the shape of a monkey.  If this was replaced by the wire “monkey” with no cloth the monkeys did not touch it and became withdrawn.

The implications for human behaviour are plentiful.  Just ask my educators.  We need from birth to be hugged and stroked.  As we grow older hugs and strokes are confined to intimate relationships but we still need “metaphorical stroking” in our wider social circles and, of course, at work.  Giving feedback to colleagues is essential to make them feel comfortable with what they are doing and/or to help them change.

In experiments that test how workers respond when the meaning of their task is diminished, the test condition is referred to as the Sisyphusian condition.  Sisyphus you’ll remember was the hubristic King who thought he was smarter than Zeus - and discovered he wasn’t.  He was doomed to successfully roll a heavy rock to the top of a hill only for it to roll back down so that he could start again and again and again …  He may still be doing it, for all we know. 

 The two main conclusions of the experiment are that people work harder when their work seems more meaningful, and that businesses totally underestimate the relationship between meaning and motivation.[1]

I saw it in the room. These people, vocational professionals, were de-motivated by the very people whose job it is to motivate them. What is going on? If this were a tale of industry it would be all over the front pages.  These people are caught between a rock and a hard place and something is going to give.  There is (allegedly) more than one way to skin a cat and there are (undoubtedly) better ways to motivate people than to beat them over the heads with the targets they’re being asked to reach.

 

BOB CLYDE

 

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[1] Ariely, Dan (2010). The Upside of Irrationality. ISBN 0061995037

 

Counter Intuitive?

These are undeniably hard times. But there have been hard times before now and (I suppose) there will be hard times again.  Witness a joke I must have heard 30 years about the lad from Eton who had to write an essay about poverty. The punch line "Even the butler was poor..." gives you an idea of its slant. But in there is a wisdom.  When times are bad it sometimes pays to go against the flow. Hire a butler for God's sake!  Instead of penny pinching - spend.  Let me give you an example.

A good friend of mine, a successful American businessman often recalls how, when he was at College, he was down to his last $6.  He had two choices. Eat for a week (it was a LONG time ago!) or buy a case of beer.  He bought the beer.  Back at the dorm he found he was more popular than ever before (the beer effect) and over a can or two of Budweiser he got talking to a chap he'd never spoken to before. My friend revealed that he played guitar. His new buddy said "My dad owns a bar downtown and is looking for someone to play weekends." You know the rest. He got the job and made $50 a week in tips and the Gibson he still plays was acquired with his "bar money".  He met his wife there too.

So sometimes it pays to buy the beer and leave the lettuce. As companies gear down the need for fresh, creative approaches increases exponentially. But nobody wants to pay for it - we're in a recession, right?  Wrong, actually.  The companies who will emerge ahead of the competition are the ones who "buy the beer". Take new approaches. Those include learning about risk, feeling comfortable with it and devising creative strategies around it.  All, curiously enough, agenda items at our forthcoming Coaching School (May 11-13th) We realised that companies need to adopt a "coaching style" of management to leverage the skills and competencies that lie hidden under "same old, same old". We approached a few. That was three coaching schools ago. It's an ILM Level 7 accredited programme. If you're interested give us a call - we'll buy you a beer (a case if it helps).  You can see details here. 

That Moment of Doubt

My flight was late last Sunday and clearly other flights had suffered the same fate as hundreds of passengers collided in passport control. I joined the shortest queue to be told by three men in unison that it was the electronic passport queue. Yikes I thought, what’s that? It sounded leading edge and techie so I can’t possibly have one of them! So I backed away from that line to stand with the unetherialised passport holders in the by now very long and winding queue.

As I was shuffling along with my bags like an old man in slippers I suddenly realised that I did in fact possess a new passport with one of these chip things and could that be what they meant by electronic? Unfortunately this explanation was at the front of the queue not at the end where you join. That moment of doubt meant that I missed my train and arrived home in the wee small hours of the morning.

Was this a typically female response engendered by the smugness men assume when they are in the know and you are not?  Or was this really a personal shortcoming-a piece of confidence that I still had to work on? I would certainly like to believe it was the latter as blaming men for a woman's shortcomings perpetuates our victimhood. What this scenario revealed to me was that confidence truly is a journey. You think you have arrived at a comfortable plateau to discover there is still a way to climb.

To discover your Confidence Quotient click here

 

 

Ros Taylor

 

Unconscious Bias

I was speaking at a seminar at a major banking group last week. There were 100 women in the audience with a scattering of supportive men. This bank is spending a great deal of money on helping women reach their potential within the organisation. Indeed this seminar was part of that offering. When it came to questions a woman in the audience picked up the business magazine that had been placed on each chair and made the fascinating observation that there were no women featured in it! There were a couple of photos of women at seminars and attending events - but none of the articles was about a woman. Gasps from the (female) Head of Banking and much rifling through the magazine in a vain attempt to discover a featured woman.

During my speech I had made much of the power of similarity as an influencer among men at the top of organisations - especially at these stressful times. What I think happens is that men go for comfort and people they can trust - other men! They know where there are with a man - they can play golf with him, talk about football and cars.

After the seminar one of the few men attending came to chat with me. He was at great pains to point out that when he plays golf with the chairman they never talk about business. And my question was "How many women play golf with the chairman and don't talk about business?" That whole bonding experience is simply not available to senior women. Of course you can't STOP this among men that would be political correctness run riot but men need to be helped to understand the unconscious bias that exists. Even amongst those men who are genuinely supportive of women in senior roles. Some open positive discussion needs to take place to enable an equality of opportunity and access to board members and senior leaders - away from the 19th hole!

 

 

What is it about women and confidence?

I'm asked to speak - almost every week it seems - to groups of women leaders. And I'd say about 50% of the time the subject matter centres around confidence. After all the conferences, workshops, focus groups and coaching with female middle managers I have organised,  the picture which emerges is of hard working women who believe that if they keep their heads down, don't rock boats and please the men around them they will be in line for leadership positions. And there they are left on the sidelines of corporate life considered as a safe pair of hands. By-passed,  some understandably lose the plot and boil over with irritation and of course this doesn't work either. Who wants a harridan at work as well as at home?

 

Yes 25% quotas would undeniably help, but there would still be a legacy of 75% men in senior positions, so quotas or no quotas I firmly believe that many of these confidence issues would remain. The real solution is for women need to find their voice - or as an American colleague calls it - 'know the words to their song'. Selling strengths, volunteering for projects, speaking up at meetings, having a view, coming up with ideas: all are important for leadership. These are all learnable skills not God-given attributes and it's high time these senior and highly capable women took the bull (as it were) by the horns and took some affirmative actions themselves! You can see some examples of what I mean in my book Confidence at Work.

 

 

The truth about Lying - Confidence in Sticky Situations

Confidence in Sticky situations

Police, politicians and journalists have had to answer some testing questions throughout this week and last. The BBC website yesterday had some advice for those in the glare of the spotlight in their item ‘What‘s the art of answering a tricky question?’ For those who didn’t catch the piece here is a selection of advice suggested:

• Sound masterful and stick to the point you have made no matter what.... even if proved wrong I wonder?
• The old tired advice of buying time by repeating the question. We are really on to that one!
• Take control of your body language. Apparently Ed Miliband touches his face a lot and we all know that means anxiety and lack of confidence. He has been trained to stop this behaviour.

Be confident and wing it was the summary of their expert findings. In other words do what it takes to act your way through the situation.

As a psychologist I have studied body language and its impact on communication. However, most television viewers are increasingly aware of this whole area of body language, especially if they take the time to watch programmes like ‘Lie to me’. As a result, the electorate has become a more sophisticated audience believing that they now know a liar when they see one.

So I am going to be contentious and make the suggestion that public figures should just find the confidence to tell us the truth not the confidence of the actor or dissembler.

What happens when we tell the truth is that our body language becomes congruent so that what we say matches the signals our body gives out. With truth there is no telltale body language leakage where a foot or hand taps, an ear is tweaked or a face touched. Typically, leakage happens when someone is lying and there is an adrenaline build up. The energy generated must make its escape somewhere, usually where they least expect. And of course with the televising of Parliament and press conferences, cameras notice.

How about we try this? Truth is an old fashioned concept that does away with spin, expensive consultants and Oscar winning performances.  It is inside out: getting your internal house in order - not grafting on pretend skills to hoodwink and betray. THAT requires REAL confidence.

Ros Taylor

 

CRISIS OF CONFIDENCE? LEAP OF FAITH?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I had been asked to deliver a seminar to a group of CEOs of medium to large organisations and met the organiser to discuss my input. I imagined speaking about innovation in the workplace, managing talent in difficult times but instead of offering up these thoughts I decided first to ask the coordinator what, given his knowledge of the group, they might find most helpful. ‘Confidence’ was his immediate response.

I was taken aback. How could these successful people lack confidence? Reflecting on it, I realised I was still hearing the same issues from the research for my book Fast Track to the Top. 

It’s lonely. You can’t confide in your top team because your decisions might affect their careers: so no objectivity there. Who do you turn to? Where's the sounding board?

No training.  Only six out of my research group of eighty CEOs had been formally trained and prepared for the job. I had no reason to think (and was subsequently proved correct) that these CEOs were any different. No wonder they lacked confidence in their leadership skills.

Performance Impact. Research from Toronto University has shown that the person leading of an organisation can influence performance by as much as ±15%. It has long been known that the characteristics that define good leaders lie in the areas of personality and cognitive ability. Most people in leadership roles get there because they are clever – or at least they were
good at what they did before they became leader. There might just be a skills gap, mightn’t there?  People know when they’re in “above their necks” – and it shows in their performance and in the reaction of shareholders. The average CEO in the UK has a lifespan of about 18 months. With so much riding on the role and no training to do it, it’s no wonder these CEOs were having a crisis of confidence. Support should be built in with the job.

Imagine getting on your next flight.  “Good morning ladies and gentlemen. My name is Captain Smith and I’ve never flown a plane before – but I am a very good accountant.” It’s laughable isn’t it? I mean it is laughable because one way or another that little scenario plays out every day. Excellent people with huge potential are pitched into jobs they can’t do – because they have never been trained to do them! Why is it that CEO development happens after they are in post or not at all? Why is it that companies are still promoting good experts and not good leaders? With so much at stake why is it such a lottery when hiring at the top? It is not fair on the organisations or indeed the poor (former) CEOs.

Ros Taylor

 

 

Ros Taylor's new book  Confidence at Work, Get It, Feel It, Keep It   is on sale now